The wonders of squatting

So, I'm not very good at keeping up with this. But while I'm on here, a few things:

The earlier post about squatting - remember? The kind of squatting for effective bowel movements? Well, I've been doing it for (I'd say) at least a month now. It's great.

Now, if you're one of those lucky humans who has twice daily regular movements, this probably won't help you. For people like me, who have slow snail metabolisms, I recommend whole-heartily. And now I say why.

It's real comfortable. More comfortable than "sitting on the throne."

Now, remember: the reason why our culture sits on a throne to pass their poo is because, obviously, it's a symbol of wealth, an act of kingship, a philosophy that we're not animals, we're made in the image of God, et cetera. I've spoken with a few people about squatting, and the general reaction is a screwed up face along with an "ew."

That's fair. It's powerfully ingrained in our collective cultural mind that this is the way the world works. If you choose to doubt it, well, you're heading into dark territories. Good luck.

This is prime experimentation for me, though. I revel in thwarting cultural norms. I questioned compulsory schooling, our monotheistic religion, and the workplace. I am now aware that all of our deeply cherished cultural trends are illusions. They're silly and mostly laughable.

When someone says "that's the way the world works," I think about the natural environment, which for the last 10,000 years man has been desperate to divorce. The way the world works, for me, lies in how the natural environment works.

And how humans naturally pass their poo is by squatting.

Unless you experience this, you might still think of it as disgusting, however, you should be aware that this notion is entirely illusory (in the sense that the monster in the closet is illusory).

When you sit on the throne, you are forcing your body, your bio-machine, to work against itself. That is why many of us strain, because we don't know that if you squat, your diaphragm against your thighs (when you simply inhale) naturally creates the pressure needed to poop.

Keep in mind that sitting on the throne keeps your large intestine locked and hinged - you're not giving it the proper signals to tell it that you are in the correct position to poop.

I'm not really keen on what damage continues to occur to the body if you sit on the throne, but from what I've read it's not good at all.

I did read that it explains why almost half of us get hemorrhoids. Yeah, that's an ew.

Okay, so I need to get off this fire and brimstone talk about sitting on the throne. Just remember that it makes all the difference if you squat. It's a little awkward to do it with a throne toilet, but you'll probably get used to it. I even developed muscles in my thighs I never knew I had, which makes all the difference when I'm standing, walking, and running.

A lot of people talk about getting back in touch with nature. Something I recently read and felt was so true is that we humans can never be divorced from nature - it's always inside us. It is us. We are nature. Why a long time ago we decided that we were something more astounds me. And I find that it explains why a lot of us feel despair with all this shallow entertainment and alienation.

Nature is you. It's in you. It's around you. So, if you want to get back in touch with nature, start squatting. You'll be on your way in no time at all.